"It Felt Dangerous to Hope" -- Siobhan Koch on Losing Her Daughter Talitha and the Journey to Her Rainbow Baby

Listen to this episode from The Rainbow Connection on Spotify. Siobhan Koch’s journey to motherhood spanned over a decade of infertility, foster parenting, adoption, and finally the miraculous unassisted pregnancy of her daughter, Talitha. In this sacred and heart-shattering episode, Siobhan shares the story of her waters breaking at 18 weeks, Talitha’s birth and brief life, and the trauma and beauty interwoven through her loss. She also opens up about becoming pregnant again by surprise, navigating the intense anxiety of pregnancy after loss, and how she and her family honour Talitha while raising her two brothers. We talk about:12 years of infertility and unexpected adoption of her son PaulBecoming pregnant with Talitha after years of fertility treatmentsPremature rupture of membranes at 18 weeks and the waiting game that followedTalitha’s birth, the sacred hour she spent alive, and saying goodbyePostpartum hemorrhage and trauma recoveryNavigating deep grief while parenting an older childThe surprise rainbow pregnancy with Silas and its intense anxietyLearning to hope again and finding support through lossHonouring Talitha daily and integrating her memory into family life This episode is tender, raw, and full of hope— a reminder that grief and joy can coexist, and that every baby’s story matters. 🕊 Get to Know Siobhan:Siobhan Koch lives in Hamilton, Ontario, with her husband and two sons, Paul and Silas, while holding close the memory of their daughter Talitha. She is a former foster mom, adoption mama, and runs a charity building tiny homes for vulnerable communities.📷 Instagram: @siobhan.koch Connect with Kristin:Website: thedoulalife.ca🌈 The Haven (Pregnancy After Loss Support Program): thedoulalife.ca/the-haven — use promo code: RAINBOW to save $100🕊 Mother Like No Other community: thedoulalife.ca/mother— use promo code: MOTHER to save 50% off your first month📷 Instagram: @the.doula.life If this episode resonates, please subscribe, rate, and share—it helps get these stories into the hands of the women who need them most.