#205: How to Process a Sudden Break-Up (AKA the "Avoidant Discard")

Listen to this episode from On Attachment on Spotify. When a relationship ends without warning, it’s common to feel blindsided, confused, and deeply hurt. This is often labelled the “avoidant discard” — but while that term might feel validating in the moment, it can also keep you stuck in a disempowering story.In this episode, we’ll talk about how to process a sudden ending in a way that honours your pain without leaving you tethered to it. We’ll explore:Why shock and lack of closure can intensify heartbreakThe difference between feeling discarded and being discardedHow villain/victim narratives can hold you back from real healingThe impact of online echo chambers on your recoveryPractical steps to reclaim your agency and move forwardThis isn’t about minimising what you’ve been through. It’s about finding a more grounded, self-responsible way to engage with what happened — so you can process it fully, integrate the lessons, and step into your next chapter with clarity and self-respect.Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website