Episode 47: Toxic Parents with Josh Connolly

Listen to this episode from Next Up: Narcissism on Spotify. Many people raised by toxic parents or caregivers don’t always recognize the abuse present in their upbringing. It’s often not until their adult relationships begin to break apart that they become aware of the abusive behavior patterns repeating from their childhood.    In this episode, I’m joined by mental health advocate and best-selling author Josh Connolly for a powerful and honest conversation about what toxic parenting really looks like and its lasting impact. We talk about parents’ refusal to take accountability, how dysfunction gets passed off as the family “norm,” and why adult children carry guilt and shame about something they were once powerless to change.    Josh discusses his use of  the word “toxic,” and how emotional abuse often flies under the radar. Josh also explains his “body first” approach to recovery, including how reconnecting with your body—and using tools like breathwork—can help regulate your nervous system and make space for emotional clarity.   We tackle the popular notion of having to forgive in order to move forward, offering our explanation as to why this is not always the case, and discuss the difference between forgiveness and acceptance .   If you’ve experienced an upbringing within the context of toxic parenting, and as a result, have difficulty trusting your own internal experiences, or feel guilty for setting boundaries, you’ll find this episode incredibly validating.   Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Introduction  03:06 Breathwork and Nervous System Regulation 05:23 Understanding Empathy and Boundaries 07:55 Defining Toxic Parents 09:00 Emotional Abuse and Power Dynamics 12:00 Misdiagnosis and Appropriate Reactions 17:10 Appropriate Reactions to Dysfunctional Environments 19:27 The Issue of Forgiveness 24:01 The Dangers of Pushing Forgiveness 27:06 Realizing the Truth About Toxic Upbringings 32:05 The Importance of Being Held and Supported 35:13 Josh Connolly’s Book: Purpose and Content 42:06 The Importance of Truth and Authenticity   Links Connect with Josh Connolly: https://www.instagram.com/josh_ffw/ https://www.facebook.com/joshffw https://www.tiktok.com/@josh_ffw https://twitter.com/josh_ffw https://www.youtube.com/c/JoshConnolly_FFW   Connect with Dr. Z: https://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/ https://www.zgrouptherapy.com/ https://www.instagram.com/dr.z_psychologist/ https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.z_psychologist https://www.youtube.com/@DrJaimeZuckerman   Get my FREE breathing exercise here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/newsletter Register for my on demand virtual courses here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/workshops Order my workbooks! *Find Your Calm / Find Good Habits* http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/books Shop my new Mindfully Messy hoodie here: http://www.drjaimezuckerman.com/apparel Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm