Ep 254: Being Seated in Self: Setting Boundaries Confidently

Listen to this episode from Help Me Be Me on Spotify. If you’re struggling with trying to keep a handle on your own beliefs in the face of a person with a strong ego, as in a romantic relationship or parental relationship where they talk you out of your feelings or tell you that you’re wrong, this is for you! A lot of people struggle to self-validate. You might defer to another person’s opinion or have a person in your life who talks you out of your beliefs, even if you feel strongly about them the moment you have them. When we are feeling insecure and second guessing ourselves, we are looking for grounding. In the spin – as I call it. We cannot discern the truth – it is illusive to us. We keep thinking “I feel this way! Am I wrong?” What we need to recognize in that moment of that feeling is that we need to back up from the issue and get a wider perspective. The issue is co-created by us and another person and the solution is a longer but accessible one.  This episode is about creating a dose of perspective with context and tools. Often what this comes down to is we are struggling to believe our feelings and trust ourselves and often the other person is controlling us. That might be sinister or it might be totally innocent and invisible to that person. For example, it could be a person who doesn’t want you to leave them. Or it could be a parent who can’t see you any other way than a child. The reason this becomes toxic and unhealthy is when it prevents you from growth. If you have a light inside you that wants to grow, to stand on your own two feet and be the boss of yourself – then this is for you. Sponsors: Chewy: chewy.com/podhelpmebeme to save $20 on your first order with free shipping  BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/helpmebeme to get 10% off your first month of therapy  Indeed: Indeed.com/HELPMEBEME for a $75 sponsored job credit Wayfair: Wayfair.com    BOOK recos for this episode: Intimate Partners https://amzn.to/4kCyBQU Dance of Anger https://amzn.to/3Iqob9T Courage to Change https://amzn.to/44La6en Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices